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The Bond of Love & Peace: Protecting Unity


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For the last few months, I've had a love/hate relationship with social media. Social media can absolutely be used for good, but it's close to impossible to open an app without seeing the latest person or company getting cancelled, a heated argument in the comments section, or people posting "If you agree with _______, you can just unfriend me." It is exhausting to sift through and confusing to know where you might stand with people you know and love.


I believe when everything feels like it’s a swirling tornado of discourse, we can always lean on the One who never changes: Jesus, who is the same yesterday, today, and forever (Hebrews 13:8). As a follower of Jesus, I can step into what feels like a snake pit and bring love and peace into every conversation I have--even with those I disagree with--to protect unity in my relationships. I can shine the light of Christ in a world that so desperately needs it.


How can I protect unity? It takes effort. But I believe the effort is worth it. It may be easier to fire off quick comments when I’m triggered or slip into a total silent treatment, but I want to take the narrow road and not grow weary of doing good. I’ve come up with three simple steps I try to rehearse and repeat when I find myself in a situation where I can move toward unity instead of division in our polarized world.


1) PRAY

One of the most impactful pieces of advice my aunt gave me after I was offended by someone in my family was to pray for them. It’s really hard for me to keep hating someone I routinely pray for.


Jesus says in Matthew 5:44, “But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.” When it’s a family member who doesn’t have a relationship with God, I pray that He would soften their heart and bring people into their life to share the gospel with them. When it’s someone I work with who holds opinions that contradict what the Bible says, I ask the Holy Spirit to give me wisdom to navigate those conversations in a respectful and gentle way, without abandoning my biblical convictions.


I’m learning that it’s possible to disagree without sowing discord, even though the internet would have me believe otherwise.


2) ASK QUESTIONS

As I read the gospels, I notice how often Jesus asks questions—even of people who disagree with Him. If you count them, He asked over 300 questions throughout the four books.


Before I press into a hard conversation, I try to start by letting a couple of Jesus’ questions search me first, and I pray that God will show me what I need to see:

  • If you only love those who love you, what reward will you get? (Matthew 5:46)

  • Why do you look at the splinter in your brother’s eye but don’t notice the beam of wood in your own eye? (Matthew 7:3)


Once I’ve taken time to check my own heart, I’m able to ask friends and family questions in good faith—and actually listen to their answers. When I enter a conversation trying to understand instead of trying to win, guards come down.


And I’ve seen, more than once, that people become more open to hearing my view and how it’s rooted in Scripture. Instead of needing to be right about politics or policies, I can focus on what Scripture says about the moral issues underneath it all. And I hold onto the truth that God’s Word doesn’t return void—it can plant seeds I may not see right away.


3) BE AN EXAMPLE

I’m able to love others because He first loved me (1 John 4:19), and I can bring peace into tense moments because I know the Prince of Peace. One of the most consistent ways I can protect unity is by choosing to live in a way that reflects the Light of Christ.


For me, that starts with immersing myself in God’s Word every single day. I won’t be transformed into the likeness of Christ if I don’t actually know the true, biblical version of Him. There’s a reason Jesus asked Peter and the disciples, “But who do you say I am?”—because what I believe about Him shapes how I stand firm as His follower in a world that keeps shifting.


When I’m grounded in God’s Word, the Holy Spirit has room to transform my mind and actions so I resemble Jesus more over time. I begin to exhibit the fruit of the Spirit—love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Instead of blocking someone I’ve been friends with for years, I can practice self-control and invite them to coffee. Instead of returning a harsh word with a harsh word, I can respond with a gentle answer. There are so many ways to protect unity in relationships, and I trust God to give wisdom for each situation as it comes.


When unity feels impossible, I remind myself that Jesus lived in a harsh political and socio-economic time, too—and He taught His followers how to navigate it. I don’t want to get caught up in the noise. I want to spend time with Him, breathing in His love and peace, so that’s what comes out of me in every situation I find myself in.


FOR FURTHER THOUGHT:

If it helps, here’s a simple way to put this into practice: As you step into a new week, consider taking these three action steps and bringing them to life. How would you best remember to practice them?


You may think about writing them on a post-it note and placing it in a high traffic area in your home or on your dashboard. Maybe journal and write down the names of those you know you'd like to pray for. Reach out to an estranged relationship and "take the lead in honoring one another" (Romans 12). Whatever God is calling you to, He will guide you through it.


If you want to go a step further and keep building this rhythm, here’s a resource that’s helped me more than once: one of my favorite reads is Chris Hodges’s book The Daniel Dilemma. I’ve read through it multiple times, and it never ceases to show me something new.


PRAYER:

Prince of Peace, You are the perfect example for me to follow as I navigate the seas of division and promote peace in my life and in the lives of those around me. Help me protect and fight for unity at all costs. You know the eternal implications of extending olive branches and building my relationships so that I can tell those who don’t know You about Your loving character. Give me wisdom and strength to walk this out. Help me look more like You in the process. In Jesus’ name, Amen.


ABOUT MORGAN BENNER


Morgan Benner

Morgan Benner is a woman transformed by faith, and if you had met her in the first 27 years of her life, you might not recognize her today. Jesus completely changed her, making her not just a different person but a new one. She now enjoys life with her best friend and husband, Derek, and their sweet three-year-old daughter, continually experiencing God’s love and growing in faith through her family. A creative at heart, Morgan uses her gifts to serve at her church—whether through video announcements, social media, small group leadership, or welcoming others into an encounter with Jesus. Professionally, she works as a Talent Acquisition Manager for a Fortune 500 company, a role that reflects her deep love for people. Known for meeting others right where they are, she is passionate about sharing the good news of the One who changed her life.


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