When Will My Life Get Easier?

Ever feel like, “When will my life get easier?”

I’ve been a sobbing heap on the floor—scared, angry, hurt, and confused about why life brought me here.  Completely unsure of how to move forward.

I’ll never forget the moment I fell to my knees and cried out to God, “Lord, I desperately need You! I know there’s light at the end of this tunnel, but right now it’s just a faint pinprick in the distance. I can barely see it. I remember that sermon—when you’re at the end of your rope, tie a knot with Jesus and hold on. Well, I’ve been holding on, Lord, but my hands are slipping. I can’t do this on my own anymore!”

The beauty of that moment can’t be overstated. 

You might be thinking, “Beauty?  Seriously?!  That sounds like anything but beautiful.”  And on some level, you’d be right.  It was painful.  Raw.  My life as I knew it scattered in broken pieces all around me.

Yet something powerful and transformative happened in that moment.  I felt God.  As in, I knew on some deep level that my cries were being heard, and this awful moment wasn’t going to be the end of my story.  In fact, God would use it to become the beginning of something amazing.

Why?  Because in that moment, all my carefully crafted control and thoughtful solutions were shattered, forcing me to truly rely on God in a way I never had before.  When I didn’t have any solutions or answers left, God did.  He could finally step in and begin transforming my story.

And as He began to rebuild what was broken, the Lord started developing a new vision for my life.  A different vision than the one I had started my journey with, certainly, yet equally meaningful.  One that honored the lessons of my past while looking ahead to new possibilities. 

Most importantly, I felt wrapped in the depth of God’s love for me.  The kind of love I never knew existed, even after many years as a believer. 

I saw it in so many ways.  It was in the money that showed up unexpectedly when I needed it.  Or the people He put in my path to support this new journey.  And especially in the rich, transformative growth He produced within me. 

I’d love to tell you I never have moments like that anymore.  That my life has been smooth sailing ever since God showed up that day and grew me like crazy. 

Umm … I’d be lying! 

Jesus said, “In this world you will have trouble,” for a reason.  I still face challenges that take my breath away.  That drive me to tears, once again on my knees with grief, anger, fear, or longing.  There are still days I’m struggling to make it through.

Nevertheless, those moments of heartache and despair are still not the end of my story, for they aren’t the end of Jesus’ legacy for me.  Sure enough, Jesus finishes His reminder of trouble with, “But take heart!  I have overcome the world” (John 16:33).  That promise has proven true again and again over the years.

And now, over many decades, I can look in the rearview mirror and see the fruit of that truth.  I see the unnecessary worry that achieved nothing but greater anxiety and stress.  God worked it out for something good in the end, as He promised He would (Romans 8:28).  It was all wasted energy.

I see, too, the growth and positivity that has come out of each situation.  So when I face another deeply challenging season, I can lean on God’s past faithfulness to strengthen me—not perfectly, but consistently.

I continually find myself surprised by how much God’s Word really rings true in the most practical of ways. Verses like, “Rejoice in the Lord always.  I will say it again: Rejoice!” and “Put on a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair,” aren’t just suggestions; they’re lifelines to supernatural strength and hope.  They are God’s battle plan to help me fight in the Lord’s strength.

Yes, there are times when I don’t turn to Him quickly enough.  Or times when I give way to the very human inclination to run from praise and rejoicing when I’m hurting. 

Turns out, every time I push through and reach for Jesus, He meets me there—and that changes everything.  I’m no longer fighting by myself in my own strength; I have supernatural support from a God who fights on my behalf.    

THIS IS HOW I FIGHT MY BATTLES

God has taught me so much through this process.  The principles I continue to learn are like precious jewels—rare and beautiful.  Here are but a few:

• AVOID IDOLATRY

When I find myself having fictitious conversations with someone—saying all I wish I could say or putting them in their place for their words or actions—those thoughts can quickly become idols. My mind can start bowing to them without realizing it, replaying the same negativity over and over.

It’s not just difficult people this applies to—it can also include obsessive worry, fear, anxiety, or anything else I run to instead of Jesus. These are challenging waters! Yet God, being God, always shows me what to replace those thoughts with …

• FIND THE GOOD

There are numerous scriptures about this, but my go-to verses are Romans 12:2 and Philippians 4:8. Romans reminds me, “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—His good, pleasing and perfect will.”

This verse reminds me that as a child of the King, I’m called to respond differently than popular culture, some counselors, or even well-meaning friends might suggest. I’m called to a higher standard.

It doesn’t mean burying my feelings; it means inviting Jesus into the center of my challenge and asking Him to heal me from the inside out. For me, this has meant letting go of my need to retaliate and choosing kindness in the face of someone else’s bad behavior. It means unclenching my fists and placing whatever I’m anxious about in Jesus’ hands—and then not taking it back again!

Flat out—this is hard! But when I pray, study, and praise my way through it—fighting to see the good—it transforms me. Those people and situations lose their hold on me. The anxiety melts away. Fear is replaced with peace.

Which leads to my next verse: “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”

It is a daily choice to actively search for and find the good that’s all around me. Sometimes the best choice I can make is to turn off the news and simply count my blessings. God has taught me to fight to see what I call “glimpses of glory.” These might be as simple as noticing a tree in bloom and thanking God for it, or as complex as choosing one thing to be thankful for on a dark, difficult day.

As God trains me to focus my mind in this way, it becomes easier and easier to do so. Which, in turn, makes it easier to praise Him amidst whatever storm I’m in—because He has shown me time and again that He is the calm in the center of my storm. The more I focus my thoughts on Him, the more I’m able to surrender and experience His comfort and love.

• GRIEVE WELL

Someone said this to me a few years ago, and it really struck a chord with me.  Most of us have experienced profound loss. God calls us not to suppress that pain, but to grieve it with Him.

In my life, that has looked like allowing myself to grieve outcomes I hoped for but didn’t get, and walking through deeper losses—like my dad and close friends I’ve loved and lost. Yet I’ve learned that grief isn’t weakness; it’s sacred. The bigger the loss, the deeper the space God holds for healing.

Even the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit express grief in Scripture. There’s actually an entire book of lament! I’ve learned to pour out the good, the bad, and the ugly before God. He can handle it all. When I bring my darkest thoughts into His light, the darkness loses its power (John 1:5, John 12:46, James 4:7).

Still, I’ve learned to guard against letting grief become an idol. Even in sorrow, I fight to find one spot of gratitude or joy each day. As I do, I rest in His comfort, trusting that even when I can’t see the end of the story, He can.

These are just a few of the ways I’ve learned to fight my battles—with praise, truth, and a heart anchored in God’s promises. The war might rage, but I no longer face it alone. My weapons are worship, gratitude, and trust—and with them, victory is already assured.

FOR FURTHER THOUGHT

Pick the one concept that most resonated with you today. Spend some time in prayer over it, asking God for clarity and wisdom.

Then, choose one practical, actionable step to take. Maybe it’s memorizing a verse to speak over yourself when life feels heavy. Or perhaps it’s diving deeper into Scripture on forgiveness, or intentionally cultivating gratitude.

Wherever you land, begin this week by keeping Christ at the very center. Then, “the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:7).

Oh—and one more thing! When I have no words left and praise feels far from my heart, I love listening to Michael W. Smith’s “This Is How I Fight My Battles.” It’s a simple yet powerful reminder that no matter what, God has me—just as He has you.

PRAYER

Lord, it may look like I’m surrounded, but I’m surrounded by You.  Thank You, Lord!  Great is Your faithfulness!  Praise Your holy name!  When I forget Your strength and might or forget Your incredible faithfulness, would you remind me of what is true: that You have me, and that I can completely depend on You.  I ask for Your strength to hold these truths dear.  I love You, Lord.  Thank You for Your goodness.  In Jesus’ name, Amen. 

ABOUT BARB LOWNSBURY

Barb is a speaker, author, and entrepreneur. She holds Bachelor's Degrees in International History and Education, as well as a Master’s Degree in Education. Barb has spoken at conferences and taught classes throughout the U.S. on topics including faith, relationships, leadership, and courage through trials. Her book, Using What’s Broken to Boldly Shine, is a powerful read on transformation through adversity. Her blog focuses on providing people with everyday encouragement and strength. Barb serves as the Executive Director for The Dented Fender Ministry and runs a successful real estate and development company. She and her husband currently reside in Dayton, Ohio.

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