Bwaahaahaa! It must’ve been like I’d issued a challenge out to the universe that said, “Please. Come and give me every occasion to test the true plumb line of my patience. Now!” Within a week or two, challenge after challenge started coming my way, and I very quickly learned, No. I am not patient. In fact, sometimes I am anything but!
Over the years I’ve learned that as soon as I think I’ve “arrived” somewhere, God shows me a whole new layer of that very thing I need to grow in. And thus begins a deeper exploration of my character, stretching me into a fuller understanding of what it really means to live a genuine, peace-filled, faith-driven life. Through the process, I’ve come to understand that my solutions tend to be results-oriented. I am a true child of the microwave society. I want it hot, fast and now! But God seems far more interested in carving out my character through relationship with Him over time. It’s not that wanting results are bad. God put that drive in me for a reason, and I get a lot accomplished because of it. I believe God put that drive in me and when I allow Him to harness it, He does some pretty remarkable things through me, ordinary though I am. The difference lies in how I approach it. Will I direct my steps, or will I submit to the Lord and let Him direct me?
When God’s directing, it always leads to rich blessing and peace. I love the results, and they are far more abundant than anything I get on my own. TRANSLATION=IT’S SO WORTH IT!!! But, when God leads the results aren’t often immediate or clear. His direction sometimes makes no sense to me from my very limited human perspective, and I don’t understand the why’s or the how’s, something my inner control freak deeply craves. It’s in those moments my faith and my patience are put to the test, where I can struggle to trust in the Lord and in His mighty power. I start to get this crazy idea that somehow I can do it better, even though every experience has shown me the lie that statement really is.
Then there are the times I’m asked to sit still and wait. That is the direction since I don’t have clarity. Lack of clarity from God doesn’t mean run ahead, therefore, and do your own thing. It actually means I need to WAIT. I immediately think of Proverbs 19:21 which says, “A person may have many ideas concerning God’s plan for his life, but only the designs of His purpose will succeed in the end” (TPT). I’ve learned sitting still isn’t a place of stagnation. It is actually an active space of listening, of frequently checking in with my Creator to allow Him to gently guide me forward in His timing since His plan work best. Running ahead has only giv